its interesting how a song written by someone else can relate to a person's situation so perfectly(even the age..lol)

Bayside - Tortures of the Damned

I hate myself more than I ever let on.

I’m burned out at 22.
I lived too fast and I loved too much and I’ll die too young, but I chose this cup that I drank from.
Knew what I was getting into.
But I couldn’t let out what I had to keep in.
I’m ashamed of myself and unspeakable sins that I’ve committed and…

I’ve made mistakes but I’ll find my way.
No explanation for
the things I’ve failed at before.
They can’t hold my hand.
It just hurts to be a man.
Through the tortures of the damned.
Of the damned.

If I only had an axe I’d sever the ties I’ve made with the world.
Maybe I can be a stranger in a strange place If I start now, maybe I can be saved.
If I only had a mask
I’d cover these bleeding eyes.
They’re bloodshot now but they’ll be black by dawn.
If I wake up now I can be pure again.

I’ve made mistakes but I’ll find my way.
No explanation for the things I’ve failed at before.
They can’t hold my hand.
It just hurts to be a man.
Through the tortures of the damned.

Look at me now, I’m on the tracks with my back towards the last train leaving town (x4).

I’ve made mistakes but I’ll find my way.
No explanation for the things I’ve failed at before.
They can’t hold my hand.
It just hurts to be a man. (Through the tortures of the damned.)

I’ve made mistakes but I’ll find my way.
No explanation for the things I’ve failed at before.
They can’t hold my hand.
It just hurts to be a man. Through the tortures of the damned.
Of the Damned!!!